The Comedy World According to Tom

As Banned (Not on TV)

2007-03-09T08:16:00.001-08:00

In order for me to tell this story accurately, I will start where it all began. None of these "in media res" bullshit. I'll start from the beginning like normal people do.
Last Friday, March 2, I did a set at the Starry Night Coffeehouse in Westminster. That night, the crowd was sort of half-and-half. Half of them got me, half of them didn't. It turns out that the half that didn't get me were the ones sitting up front. When I did the material that usually gets a good response, these people in the front didn't laugh. They didn't laugh at anyone else who went up that night, but that's beside the point. Here's where I decide to have a little fun with them. After a punchline I wrote got very little response, I repeated the punchline with more force in my voice. This time, the laughs were a little bit more infectious. Not that much, but better than my first telling of the punchline. I then made the comment "It's like performing for a meat locker in here tonight." And the crowd kind of liked that. Whether it was my delivery or just my overall uppitiness, they kind of dug it. So I finished with my set and got off stage.
Last night, I received an email message from the venue telling me that "Friday's show is a no-go." I checked the pages of other comics who regularly perform there and saw that there was still something taking place on Friday night. I called the venue to ask what was going on.
The woman on the phone told me that I was not welcome back at Starry Night anymore. I, of course, asked why. I had been performing there every Friday for the past six weeks using 100% unrestrcited content and after every week, they've always asked me to come back. She told me it was because she received numerous complaints. What about, I asked. You, she said. What about me, I persisted. She told me that I had been doing the same material over and over again. I told her that wasn't true; it was the case that while some of my material I had done was from previous weeks, I had some new stuff in there as well. Keeping in mind, this is an open mic. The whole purpose of an open mic is for comics to work on their bits so that when they get a paid showcase, they can have a polished set to perform. It wasn't like I was a parrot, imitating previous setups/punchlines. I was changing it up a bit.
I explained this to the woman over the phone and she said, "Oh, so what about when some people weren't laughing because they'd heard the stuff before and you called my customers in my place of business 'slabs of meat'?" I told her that it was only meant to be taken as a joke. I am a comedian, that's what I do. Fairly harmless comedy material intended to make people laugh. That's it.
I guess my rational thoughts weren't enough to sway this woman. She insisted on telling me that I was still not welcome back. I know when to keep fighting and I simply hung up the phone. There is no reasoning for someone who can't reason.
So, that's another little adventure in the journey that is the life of comedian Tom Myers. I'm not writing this blog to tell you not to go to Starry Night Coffeehouse again. I wouldn't do that.I'm just telling you what happened. I'm also, dare I say it, shocked and amazed that after six weeks of loyalty and telling me to come on back, they would fold like a card player with a pair of deuces and tell me I'm not welcome back anymore.
Well, there's other games and other venues in town and I just have to go to them. It's not as though the stage time well is going to run dry. I've got about a dozen other bookings that take me all the way into mid-June. Some of them have very lucrative potential, too! So, overall, I'm not complaining.
Until later!
~TOM

On Political Comedy

2006-11-26T22:32:00.000-08:00

Last year, I was invited (check that -- I imposed myself) to write my thoughts about political comedy on DC Standup. I imposed myself on these three questions.
1) Why doesn't Washington DC, the political capital of the country, produce more "political" comics? 2) Why are people more willing to espouse left-leaning views on stage than conservative views? 3) Who is the best political comic of all time?
Here were my answers.
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Answer #1: After a careful reflection, I have come to understand the following about political comedy. Trying to do political jokes, even in DC, is like walking across a mine field. If you step in an area you shouldn't go, audiences, much like the mine, will explode in anger, and in either case, the comic will die, on stage or in the field.
(Some of you might be asking me, "Tom, why would a stand-up comedian be walking through a field littered with mines?" That's a different story altogether – and a very painful one.)
Regardless of how people feel about politics or how they feel about President Bush's last speech about Iraq, Social Security, or whatever issue the media decided to focus on that day, comedians' political views have kept many marginalized and trivialized for years, owing to the fact that many people are surrounded by politics all day long (on television, in the newspaper, the guy sitting next to them at the local watering hole) and aren't in the position to have it thrown back in their faces when they come out to a comedy show. They come there to laugh at simple things in life, like airplane food and supermarkets. People want a quick fix when they go to a comedy show. They want something to satisfy their humorous cravings in a way that they can easily understand it, without having to think extensively for long periods of time. How do you think Larry the Cable Guy grew such a strong following?
I believe the reason more political comedians have not emerged out of DC is because there is not enough dissent and distrust within the populous of this country to be able to poke fun at American politics, although I think Cindy Sheehan is slowly changing that. When the United States initially got involved in Vietnam, people were led to believe that it was the right thing to do because Americans did not want another country to fall to the Communists. As the war continued throughout the 1960s and early 1970s, many Americans began questioning their concern for the Communist menace and they introduced the American menace. As a result, people began to understand government incompetence and pain-in-the-ass bureaucracies almost like they understand how horrible airline food is and how difficult it can be to find something in the supermarket.
So, why haven't more political comedians emerged out of DC? My short and sweet answer, give it time. People will catch on eventually.
Answer #2: I think the answer to this question lies in demographics. For the most part, performance art of any kind tends to attract crowds looking to escape from the ideas that they were taught growing up, such as you go to school for forever, you go to college for forever plus four more years, acquire debt due to student loans, work until you pay them all off and then you die. Pretty bland stuff. That's why people not happy with the status quo are attracted by comedy. Stand-up comedy is pretty much a way to grow up and evolve, for audience and comedian alike.
Answer #3: I think the "best" political comedians are ones that don't have an entire row of CDs for sale at Best Buy or Circuit City. Specifically, I am a fan of Richard Belzer, who has been incorporating politics into his act since he started doing stand-up comedy in 1972. In the 1980s, his phenomenal views of Reaganomics probably would've gotten him shot in rural America, but he found a way to express his views in a way that people could understand them. As a result, he maintained a strong cult status even into today, where he does some of the same material today that he did 33 years ago. In my mind, the Belz is the Man.
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Take them for what they are. This was Tom Myers in September 2005.
~TOM

Larry the Cable Guy

2006-09-01T08:12:00.000-07:00

I don’t understand Larry the Cable Guy. There is one thing I can say without hesitation: I don’t consider him a comedian, at least what I believe a comedian should be, at least not an Enlightened one.
As I am writing this long-hand before I type it into the online world, I am sleeping in, what was fifteen years ago, my cousin’s bedroom in what is still my aunt’s home in Landenberg, Pennsylvania. I am lying here trying to go to sleep so that I can wake up and go to a family reunion in West Chester, just a tad north of Landenberg. I know it will be difficult to explain to my relatives what I do. What will be most frustrating is if I tell people that I am a comedian, they will automatically associate me not with George Carlin, Lewis Black, Bill Hicks, or Richard Pryor, but with Larry, the Cable Guy. Being West Chester, I will probably be peppered with “Git-R-Done” again and again throughout the entire damned afternoon.
I do not make blanket statements like this without having evidence that backs up my claims. I have seen a few Larry the Cable Guy performances, those few have been enough for me. I don’t care to watch any more. Coming out to applause at the start of his set, he will dance to get the audience more riled up. After the dance, he’ll inform his audience, “Yeah, I had to get ma’ underwear outta ma’ crack.” The first time you see it, it’s kind of funny. And I mean “kinda.” After you see it a few more times, it is not even “kinda.” He does this at the start of EVERY set???? Hmmm … you would think that this man would figure out that this problem was going to occur ahead of time and rectify the situation before coming out on stage. However, if he gets rid of that one bit, he will lose half of his act that will actually work with an Enlightened audience.
The other half, of course, is the catchphrase “Git-R-Done.” This guy should be able to stroll out, say “Git-R-Done” non-stop for forty minutes, walk offstage, collect his check and be on his way until the next time he’s thrown into the barrel like a monkey at the Delaware State Fair.
Comedy is supposed to be performers having original thoughts, which is to say that the comedian is to bring his own original thoughts to a particular subject. Larry, the Cable Guy may do this, but the whole idea is cheapened and compromised by the catchphrase, which I can tell the Cable Guy himself is getting sick of saying time and time again. I can just see the pain on his face when he realizes the only way to shut some loudmouth hillbilly heckler in the audience up is to say “Git-R-Done” the MIDDLE of one of his bits. With a catchphrase, he was painted himself into a corner out of which there is no way to get out.
Speaking of catchphrases, there is something else Larry the Cable Guy says that, if said by other comic, particularly a struggling one, would get them the cold shoulder from the audience. After a particularly off-color joke, “Larry” will say “I don’t care who you are. That’s funny right there.” I’ve got news for you. Judging from my own personal experiences about what I find funny and other performances from comics bombing on stage while begging (unsuccessfully) for laughs, if a comedian has to tell someone that a joke is funny after you tell it, it’s not. End of discussion. As far as I’m concerned, that bit is never going to be funny.
To sum it up, I do what I do. Larry the Cable Guy does what he does. There are fans of me. There are fans of Larry the Cable Guy. I know that the chances of these two groups mingling are less than one percent. I say, let everyone do what they want to do.
And as a side note, during the reunion, there was not one “Git-R-Done” uttered. There is still hope for the people of West Chester, Pennsylvania.

The Comedy World According to Tom

2006-08-03T11:26:00.000-07:00

Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Tom Myers. I am a stand-up comedian, based in Baltimore, MD. However, I have done shows outside of the Baltimore area. Most of these shows have been in the DC-Metro area, such as the District, College Park (in Maryland), Arlington and Alexandria (in Virginia). The furthest I have ever traveled to a show is Richmond, Virginia. I hope to travel to other regions of the U.S. and eventually, travel around the world doing comedy. I consider performing more than a hobby and I feel I take it more seriously than other comedians that I've seen in my five years doing comedy.

The sole purpose of this blog, "The Comedy World According to Tom," is to give my readers a perspective on the world of comedy. As I have only performed in Maryland, DC, and Virginia, I will focus on those comedy scenes and my observations about what goes on and how such events affect the comedy scene in general. All I am doing in these posts is expressing my opinion. These posts are not always meant to be taken literally and I do joke a bit when writing them. Of course, feedback (good and bad) is always appreciated. I will read each of your messages and take them into consideration when writing my entries.

I write this blog more for the benefit of the readers than for my own personal gain, but I will say that it is an honor to be selected to write for Omaemoda Productions. I hope to submit many entries for as long as I am capable of sitting at a keyboard and typing, which should be for many years.

Until the next post,
~TOM